Well, it didn’t work out quite like I had hoped. The deal was this: Sex. Every Wednesday and Sunday at lunchtime. It didn’t work out quite that way.
I made a point of making myself available, often available and nude, on the aforementioned days of the week, at noon. A few times we had sex. Most of the time hubby would lay around for an hour, say he didn’t have time for sex and leave.
I know what you’re thinking: He’s not interested. And I don’t blame you. If you were writing this, I’d be thinking exactly the same thing. But he is interested. He does want to have sex more often. He is just emotionally shut-off and not particularly engaged or clued in when it comes to other people.
For a month I tried. I tried by simply being there, mentioning our plan upon occasion and hoping for the best. The best didn’t happen. Improvement did. We had a lot more sex last month than we did the month before. In fact, we had more sex the first day we spoke about our plan than we did the month before, which isn’t saying a whole bunch.
So far as the scheduled sex went, it was typical us: DH was emotionally unavailable and unaware that I even had feelings, much less that he was hurting them. I was trying hard but eventually got pissy about it and quit being nice. In the end, I did patiently explain to him, AGAIN, that our agreement was ‘X’ and that I had been available for ‘X’ every time and that he had made excuses and waffled and been downright mean about the whole thing. I told him that he needed to grow his balls back.
This is another problem, his lack of balls, for anther page, but in this scenario his lack of willingness to put himself out there is a Really Big problem. Goddamn, there I am, willing, waiting, if not ready which is all it takes for most men. My man? Oh hell no, he’s going to break out every passive aggressive trick he can in order to manipulate and hurt me, and he did.
Did it get him laid? No. It didn’t do a damned thing for my sex life either.
The good news is that we did manage to have sex more often last month, which was good. It is always good when we get around to it. For now, I will continue to check my pride at the door and be fuck-ready every Wednesday and Sunday at noon. Hubby? He’s making a point to grow ’em back and I think it might be working. Yesterday was Sunday after all, so I checked.