Endings, Creating Space

I once bought a tub of sugar scrub at the health food store. I paid $18 for 12 oz of scrub. Then? I went home, used it, liked it, read the ingredients and decided to make my own. And it was good. So I gave it away as gifts to family and friends who all loved it and wanted more.

My husband noticed this and because he is financially focused, hard working and good at making money he told me that I should sell it. He told me this repeatedly. For years. Finally I gave in and tried. Sort of.

We lived in rural NC at the time, 45 minutes from everywhere and, at the time, I was homeschooling three children. A high school Junior, an 8th grader and a kindergardener. I also had several horses, chickens, goats, rabbits, dogs, cats and a flock of sheep to take care of. And a house. And three meals per day to cook and clean up after. And it was not so good.

But he insisted and pressed and pushed and I obeyed (even though I crossed my fingers and lied about that in our marriage ceremony). Eventually two of these kids graduated and we were living back in civilization again and I was selling my products through a lovely local company. Yet I still did not have the time or motivation (or capital) required to make a go of a small business. And, to be honest, the motivation was the thing most lacking. I don’t *want* to market my bath products. I want to make them and give them away as gifts.

Last week I broke the news to my husband who jumped like I had shot him. He started to argue with me but I laid it all out there and then dropped the, “I am just not doing going to it, so get over it,” card on the table. Maybe he understands, maybe he doesn’t, but it doesn’t matter.

I have dissolved the business, taken it off of the website it was marketed through and intend to use every bit of the remaining inventory on my own skin. So there. And do you know what? I feel a hundred pounds lighter. My entire life just became so much easier you wouldn’t believe it. No hours of downloads, packaging, concocting, or labeling. No festivals, vendors booths, no more tables to man for hours on end.

There are other things to be cast off. This is the time of year for doing this sort of thing, this creating space, reorganizing, cutting away the dead wood. What are you doing to make more room for YOU?


About Bettina Colonna Essert

Illuminated Magdalene High Priestess and facilitator of empowerment and healing circles for girls and women, including a monthly Red Tent Temple. BA in English, minor in anthropology. Waldorf homeschool mom. Reiki master, cranial sacral therapist, herbalist, menstruvist, feminist, epicurian.
This entry was posted in Alchemy Redefined, health and well-being, personal. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Endings, Creating Space

  1. Lydia Netzer says:

    I love it. I also love that lavender oil I bought from you at co-op. So… hmm….

  2. Cerwydwyn says:

    So now you can have it for free, as a gift!

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