Inspired by a friend on Facebook, I undertook a 30 day, out loud or on the screen, rather, project to recognize things I am grateful for. Every day, the rules went, I had to write down 3 things for which I was grateful, no repeats.
Today is day 30 and I am finished and trying to think of what good this gratitude project did for me. Honestly, it didn’t do much. Some days coming up with something deep and meaningful was easy, others? Not so much. In the end I don’t feel changed at all. I am not more grateful, nor am I more cognizant of the things for which I should be grateful. In fact, this journal may have had exactly the opposite of the intended effect: I may be more aware of the things that people, my family in particular, are used to dumping on me and which I don’t want to carry anymore.
So maybe it did change me a little bit. It made me a little harder and that wasn’t what it was supposed to do at all.